I am one person with autism

Why am I writing a blog about Asperger’s Syndrome (AS) when there are so many information, advocates and auto-biographies out there on the autism spectrum and AS?

Firstly, in the hope of making my dream comes true, I see the need to reach out to a wider audience. There is nothing noble about my motivation writing this blog, which is driven entirely by self-serving interests. Secondly, many times I read about a topic by someone on the spectrum, I do not find myself identifying with them. I thought they do not represent me. While I find that a bit unsettling, I take that to be an affirmation of the saying that “When you’ve met one person with autism, you’ve met one person with autism” (Dr. Stephen Shore). This means no two autistic individuals are the same and in vain of finding a source that speaks to my mind, I decide to write my own (you could say that is the narcissistic motive). This blog is about MY autism. 

During my childhood and adolescent years, I didn’t understand why it is that I don’t seem to fit into the groups in my class. I didn’t seem to share a common topic with my classmates and didn’t understand the social dynamics going on. Then I grew up and heard about autism and AS. I find out about Professor Tony Attwood, a leading expert on AS, and his book, “The Complete Guide to Asperger’s Syndrome”. As I was reading it, everything seems to fall into place I was thinking, “that’s me!” 

I read there is a phase of making peace with yourself after getting a diagnosis in adulthood. However, that was only a brief phase in my case. No sooner than I finish reading the book, I have so many questions in my mind I thought what I need right now is A Complete Guide to Neurotypicals (a term to refer to the ordinary population). At the same time, as I start to read more about the experiences of other people on the spectrum, I become troubled by the fact that I don’t find myself identifying with their experiences. It is ironic that after all those years of wondering why it is that I’m different from my peers, I am now wondering why it is that I’m different from my fellow Aspies (people with AS). There is such a tremendous amount of knowledge to learn about the human brain and mind. I am not so much troubled by the fact that I am different, it is the lack of understanding, not knowing why or what makes me or us different, that troubles me. Personally, I do not want to be an enslaved to the mundane worldly affairs so being different is good and for anyone saying weird is bad or alone is lonely, I beg to differ. I think it is awesome to be weird and a blessing to be alone. 

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4 thoughts on “I am one person with autism

    1. Thanks Suzanne, I totally forgot I had written a post with this title! Guess I can say my views haven’t changed much lol 😅 Thanks for refreshing my own memories! 😂
      I love the motto… is that where you’re from/where those lovely pictures of yours are taken?🏡 🌲 🌳 🌴

      Liked by 1 person

      1. I was rather afraid to get on WordPress so I look back at my own stuff and how I didn’t know where to begin…not that I do now. 😂 You did a great job. Im amazed at people who know where they are right in the beginning.

        Yes and no. I live in Texas and have all my life. But I don’t live in Austin. It’s a great place though. I’ve visited a few times. It’s quite beautiful and they believe strongly in recycling and protecting the environment. Of course it also houses our state government so there are some politicians roaming around, ugh. 😂

        Most of the photos I share are taken here in east Texas, a lovely area.
        Take care 😊❤️

        Liked by 1 person

      2. I’m still very lost 😂 I seldom looked back at what I wrote. Several times when I tried to keep a physical diary in the past, I always ended up tearing away the old entries. Emotionally, it was too much to bear and I think my writing sucks, my story sucks, my life sucks, why do I want to keep something that makes me hate myself even more. I could still delete my old posts but I try not to as that would defeat the purpose of this blog.
        Enjoy your weekend, take care and catch up soon 💕

        Liked by 1 person

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